Random, Part Deux.

I'm bored, so I thought I'd continue the list. Sad, huh?

62. I don't like to spend more than three dollars on an article of clothing.
63. I think I've become addicted to blogging. I need to go to Bloggers Anonymous. But then you'd all know I went there... so would it be anonymous? Hmm... Not like anyone reads this anyway! I can say anything I want here. Muahahaha.
64. I like making lists. I'm not sure why.
65. I'm a hopeless romantic =]
66. I want someone to just lay out in the middle of a grassy field with me, watching the clouds, and talking about anything and everything...
67. I looooove Halloween, even though I don't celebrate it. I love all the shows and movies that are on during October. And carving pumpkins, of course!
68. I have never bought snacks from a movie theatre. I always just sneak stuff in.
69. I seriously am insecure. I don't always act like it, but I'm so insecure, it's not even funny.
70. I like cooking, usually, but I haven't done much of it. But that's going to change, starting hopefully next week. ^_^
71. I love taking walks. =]
72. I don't do a lot of things I want to do.
73. There are many days when I just want to pack up and leave. But I won't.
74. I love helping people. When others are happy, I'm happy. When others are depressed, I'm depressed.
75. I can't stand to see people hurting.
76. I really want someone to hug me and tell me it's all going to work out...
77. ...Even if I don't believe them.
78. I enjoy going to Walmart at random times of the day/night.
79. I have never had my ears pierced.
80. I have a hard time expressing myself sometimes. I grew up in a family that doesn't really talk to one another, so what do you expect?
81. I really like stars. I want some of those metal star decorations for... I don't know. My room or my bathroom or something.
82. I don't know how to play chess, even though I've seen many people play it. There are just too many rules to remember! I can never remember where the pieces can move. Oh well.
83. I don't usually like playing most games. I'd rather sit and watch.
84. I want to be completely honest with everyone.
85. I want to tell someone everything that I feel, but nobody's really listened. Either that, or I just... couldn't express what I wanted to say.
86. Once I move out and buy a house, I want a lot of pets. ^_^
87. I love pens. Plain and simple.
88. And Post-It Notes.
89. There aren't any square post-its at my work, at least in my desk, and it drives me crazy! We only have the stupid small rectangles, and you can't write anything on those!
90. I love polka-dots.
91. I don't like getting things out of bags that have been in the fridge or freezer. It grosses me out.
92. The smell and look of leftovers also gross me out.
93. I was so bored at work once, I printed out a whole sheet of labels and started personalizing them by drawing pictures on them with colored pencils. I got about halfway done before I ran out of things to draw.
94. I have never gotten a speeding ticket.
95. I have been pulled over once, but that was only because the state patrolman was informing me that my headlight had just burnt out.
96. I daydream A LOT.
97. I love Ted Dekker's books!!!
98. I miss acting =[
99. I want to move out very soon.
100. I love the Abs Diet books!

Kelsey

Random.

Well, it's a Thursday night, The Office isn't on (sad!), I'm still in a bit of pain (though I won't admit it anywhere but on here...), and I'm extremely bored.

My friend told me that I should just start listing random facts about myself, and I thought, what the heck. Why not? I don't know how far I'll get. I hate talking about myself. I'm also slightly out of it, thanks to the antibiotics and the Vicodin. Yay. I'll try not to state obvious things here, like "I'm 17. I'm a girl. Blah blah blah." =]

1. Yo hablo espanol (but I sadly cannot type out any kind of accent easily on my laptop. Darn you, laptop!)
2. J'apprends a parler francais.
3. It's bugging me how oddly that sentence looks without any accents.
4. I know some ASL. I used to know a lot more, but... it's been a while.
5. I'm an artist! I love to draw. Like, seriously. Oh, but you know how they always say that the hardest thing to draw is people, especially the human face, and if you can draw it, you can draw anything? Yeah. Not really. I can draw faces pretty well, but I'm not so good at other things.
6. I'm scared to death of ants.
7. I loooove watching Ghost Hunters! =]
8. It may be cliche, but I really do love the rain. ^_^
9. I don't really drink soda anymore. I'll drink it occasionally, but not really.
10. I really want to go to a castle someday...
11. ...Especially Leap Castle in Ireland.
12. I kind of want to go to the Hellfire Caves too, even though it's gotten to be kind of a tourist-y place.
13. ...And Vlad the Impaler (Dracula)'s Castle. Wow, that makes me sound dark. That's funny!
14. Mon petit ami is one of the greatest guys in the world. He's amazing. Seriously ^_^
15. If I'm not at home, work, or school, I'm most likely at Yoke's. I'm not sure why, but I seem to live there.
16. I have never been out of the country.
17. The closest I've been to leaving the country was going to Hawaii. Everyone there is Japanese anyway =]
18. I want to go on a road trip with a friend soon. ^_^
19. The freecreditreport.com songs are very catchy...
20. I have random things saved on my computer, or on DVDs that have all my files from my old computer...
21. ...like certain stories from middle school involving french fry guns and blindness.
22. ...I also have the official book of those stories lying around here somewhere.
23. I want to go find that book now so I can read IOT, parts 1, 2, 3, and the second number 3.
24. I've become slightly OCD about teeth-brushing and hand-washing.
25. I actually am OCD about my bedtime routine.
26. My room scares me at night.
27. I hardly ever remember my dreams.
28. I miss Silver Lake Camp!
29. I always wanted to go to Camp Waziyatah (Bug Juice. Duh.)
30. I have almost all the episodes to season one of Bug Juice saved on my computer. =D
31. I'm still looking for season 2, but it's extremely hard to find.
32. I have a recorder, and I can play it. Amazing. ^_^
33. I really like peanut butter m&ms, even though I try not to eat junk food anymore.
34. I actually like working out, but I haven't had much time to do so lately. How sad.
35. ... And my room is a mess right now (we're remodelling, and I just got done dogsitting a few days ago, so my stuff is everywhere!), so I can't even work out in my room at night like I usually do.
36. I'm a texting maniac ^_^
37. I'm finding this to be a lot easier than I thought...
38. I like having deep conversations, but they don't happen often enough.
39. I'm a very good liar.
40. ...Which means I'm very good at hiding my feelings. Trust me.
41. I go through weird phases.
42. Like my Josh Groban phase, which should be starting anytime now. =D
43. And my Final Fantasy phase. It hits at random times.
44. And my Harry Potter fanfic phase. Yes... Just don't ask ^_^ (yay dramione!)
45. I often make jokes or try to change the subject matter to something lighter when I'm hiding something.
46. Public speaking doesn't really bother me...
47. ...Unless I have to speak in a different language. Like French.
48. I have pretty low self-esteem.
49. I don't take compliments very well.
50. I like a really odd menagerie of music.
51. I buy most of my clothes at St. Vincent or yardsales.
52. I'll tell you just about anything, if you ask me.
53. I sponsor a little girl in Ghana, and I love her to death!
54. I really do want to travel the world. I know everyone says that, but I mean it!
55. I want to start taking karate again.
56. Black cherry Propel has become my new addiction...
57. I like office supplies, and I'm not sure why...
58. I have waaaay too much random sheet music saved on my computer. I hardly ever even play my flute anymore! Plus, my French flute is broken, and that's my best one...
59. I love Tim Burton movies! ^_^
60. Eyeshadow entertains me =]
61. My car is the same age as me. Neat, huh?


Ahh. So the list ends at 61. For now, at least ^_^ I've gotten too distracted to continue. Or, I keep spacing out because of the meds. Same thing, really. I fear if I don't end this nonsense blog now, I'll just keep rambling! I'll put you out of your misery and stop. Now. Okay? =D

Kelsey

"All Around Me" - Flyleaf

I'm sure most of you out there have heard this song, since it was at the top of the charts for quite a while. But have you listened to it? I mean really listened to it? It's such an inspiring song...

For those of you who don't know, Flylead is a mainstream secular band, but all the members are Christians. So, if you actually pay attention to their songs, you'll find a lot of meaningful and even worshipful lyrics.

Take this part of the song for example:

My hands float up above me
And You whisper You love me
And I begin to fade
Into our secret place

How great is that? It's talking about worship and getting into that place where it's just you and God. Not only that, but it's talking about being able to feel how much God loves you, and how He loves all of us enough to have that secret place with us. A special place where only two people can go. A place where you can seek peace, take off your mask, and truly be yourself!

I seriously encourage you to listen to this song. And I mean really listen.
And just imagine: This message of God's love has been played on the radio and on TV all around the world. If only more people would start listening, they might understand how powerful, marvelous, strong, and loving God is...

Kelsey

Worship.

This is an amazing video.

If you haven't seen it, watch it.

If you have seen it, watch it again. ^_^

It's an old video, but it's great. Leeland (the band) had a show get rained out, so they ended up playing some songs in a fast food place across the street. But this video just shows how intense worship can be. I mean, just watch Leeland (the person) and Jack throughout the video. It's just amazing. =]

Oh, and I'm very happy, by the way! I found out yesterday that Leeland was going to be in Idaho this weekend, and I really wanted to go to their concert. But, I never found out when it was, and I'm pretty sick, so it wouldn't have worked out. Oh, and I wouldn't have any way of getting there. But anyway, the church they played at streams all the services online, so Leeland had live video streaming from their concert! It was great =D

I also had the opportunity to just spend some time in God's presence today. And you know what? It totally made my day ^_^ He gave me the clarity I needed, and I'm confident the situation will turn out well.

So if you havent had the opportunity to do so, I highly suggest spending some time with God. Now. =D

Kelsey

Abs Diet.

So, about a week ago, I learned about something that got me really excited: The Abs Diet. I'm sure I had heard of it before, I just didn't know anything about it. But I had been searching for some new excercises, and in the process, I stumbles across the greatness that is the Abs Diet.

The thing is, it really isn't a diet. A diet is something that involves counting calories, forcing yourself not to eat the things you like, but binging on them anyway after you break down, and it's something that's not designed to last. The Abs Diet isn't like this. Abs Diet Power 12 stands for the twelve foods and types of food you should be eating to keep your body functioning as it should. But, at the same time, the creator of the Abs Diet, David Zinczenko (of Men's Health Magazine) wants you to cheat every week. He flat-out tells you to eat one meal every week that you want to eat. Go out and eat a burger, or get some pizza, or have a banana split! That keeps you from binging during the week. If you plan when you're going to have your cheat meal, it gives you something to look forward to. "I really want a candy bar right now, but if I have one, it means I won't be able to have a slice of pizza on Thursday!" No, you don't have to cheat every week. And, after a while of following the Abs Diet, you probably won't want to cheat as often.

Another great thing about it is that you aren't starving all day. Diets tell you to eat smaller portions and restrict calories. Yes, you should eat smaller portions, but the Abs Diet has you eating three average-sized meals a day, plus three snacks a day. That's SIX times you're eating a day! The books give great examples of what you should eat in a typical day. Maybe you'll have a bowl of oatmeal, some fruit, and an egg for breakfast, yogurt with almonds for a snack, a turkey sandwich with vegetables for lunch, a smoothie for a snack (smoothies are very important with the Abs Diet because they're an excellent provider of protein and various nutrients), a chicken dish for dinner, and some fruit for a snack. How great is that?

The book also has a workout plan basically laid out for you. You don't have to start the workout routine until the third week, but you can start before if you want. But when you start, you'll alternate weight-training and cardio workouts, along with ab exercises mixed in. You'll also have a free day a week. The book (especially the workout planning book) has a ton of exercises split up into their different categories, so you can just pick three or four of them to do.

I highly recommend the Abs Diet to anyone! If you want to lose some weight, tone up, or just start treating your body better, this is the lifestyle for you! The books tell you what to do, but they also tell you why you should be doing it, and what it does for your body. I haven't been doing this for very long, but it's definitely something I'm going to stick to. =D

Kelsey

Today. =D

Today started off as a ho-hum sort of day.
I don't work on Mondays, which is nice. Anyway, I woke up to my phone ringing (I'm glad my sister calls me early in the morning when I don't have to work). Then I put my clothes in the dryer, since I had forgotten to do that last night. Oops. I talked to mi madre a bit, then I got in the shower. How exciting.
But then, I got a phone call that changed it all ^_^
Sure, I already knew what was told to me in the conversation, but still. It was different this time =]

Then I cleaned for the rest of the day. Oh, and I went to Yoke's. How exciting.
And then I felt like crap for practice tonight. My dad had been a major jerk before I left, I had a killer headache, and I was running a fever. I could barely stay standing up. It was NOT fun. =[

But now I can't wait for Wednesday ^_^
And this weekend! I'm going to Silverwood again!

But tomorrow isn't going to be fun at all. I have to work =[
Oh, and as soon as I get my schedule resolved, I'm going to look for a second job. I'm hoping to just get a job at Yoke's or something. Just something I can do on Mondays and the weekend, and possibly after work on some days. I desperately need the money, otherwise I can't transfer to another college when I graduate. Ugh.

Anyway, I might keep you updated with this week. Who knows? It's going to be very long, but very jam-packed at the same time. But I seriously just want to skip tomorrow altogether!

Whatever. Love you all ^_^

Kelsey

Sunshine. ^_^

I'm sorry for the ranting that I've done in the past however many blogs. That's exactly what I said I would try NOT to do. Oops =D

Anyway, some updates of what's been happening:

-I have almost fully completed summer quarter! It ends this Friday (except both my classes are probably ending on Thursday! Thank goodness...)

-I've been working like crazy at my job. Oh, did I even mention on here that I got a job? Well, I did. I'm the secretary, err, "administrative assistant" at my old church. It's not fun working for my old pastor and his daughter (they are HORRIBLE bosses!), but it pays well. But really, I'm way over-qualified for the job. It's not even funny. But still, I've been working there like crazy.

-I'm over my mysterious illness! Last week, starting on Monday, I got really sick. Then, I pulled an all-nighter that night, which didn't help. But it was so bad, I couldn't eat or drink anything. I couldn't talk on Monday and most of Tuesday in anything above a (very hoarse) whisper. Finally I was able to down a few sips of 7-Up on Tuesday night, and I was able to eat things like soup and light foods on Thursday. So basically, I went almost four days without food, and two days without anything to drink. And I couldn't stand for more than ten minutes without almost passing out or blacking out. It was not fun!

-I've actually started working on my vocal exercises and such again! You know, the important things. Except my throat still hasn't completely healed, and I'm not sure why. Starting today, I'm going to try taking a teaspoon or more of honey to try to get it up to par again. I hate honey, but I'm going to suck it up (literally, in this case).

-I've discovered that I'm a great public speaker. I've been voted the best speaker in my speech class. Apparently my speeches are always interesting, and my speech content mixed with my dramatic voice stylings tends to captivate an audience. It was quite surprising, actually. And the weird thing is, I'm best when I improv my speeches. I mean, I'll have an outline, but I have no clue what I'm going to say until five minutes or so before I go up there. And still, I don't necessarily follow those ideas. It's still very weird to me.

Hmm. I'm feeling very drowsy ^_^
Maybe it has to do with the "two hours of sleep a night" thing.
Whatever. I'm going to finish up with my speech, then get ready and go to bed!
Goodnight!

Kelsey

I'm Only Human.

There are a few things about myself that are really starting to annoy me:

I'm too nice of a person.
I care too much about others.
I care more about my friends' happiness than my own happiness.
Actually, I care more about everyone else's happiness than my own.

These things, in and of themselves, are not bad things. But they've started to become bad things in my life. I always jeopardize my own happiness for the happiness of others.

I do what others want to do because I want them to be happy. I'll give up important things in my life if it makes someone else happy. I step back if I find out that one of my friends happens to like the same guy I do, just because it'll make her upset if we both have feelings for him. I stay up all night giving advice because I want my friends to be happy. I'll provide a shoulder to cry on when anyone's upset.

But do you know what I'm getting out of all of this?
Nothing.
Not really, at least.

Do I get to do what I want to do? No. I'm missing out on things that are really important to me. I end up dating all the losers and jerks because I let my friends date the nice guys. I miss out on any shot of actually sleeping (which probably wouldn't happen anyway, since I'm an insomniac), and I end up adding someone else's problems onto my own. I end up with a wet shoulder and end up feeling horrible because there's usually nothing I can do to help.

I'm glad that I do honestly care about people.
But I hate- yes, I mean hate- getting the short end of the stick for everything.

Why can't I be happy? Why can't I do what I want to do? Why do I have to give up what's important to me? Why can't I date someone I actually like? Why can't I ask for advice? Why can't I cry on someone's shoulder?

It just doesn't seem fair sometimes. I don't want to stop being a nice person, but I don't want to risk losing my own happiness in the process...

Can't I just be selfish every once in a while?

And then, when I'm having a bad day and I just feel like ranting (but don't, usually), I might let some comment slip, or I'm not as happy and upbeat as normal, people think I'm depressed. I get messages and comments from certain people telling me that it makes them sad to see me like this.
Like what?
Having a bad day?
I'm sorry that I'm human. I do have bad days every once in a while, especially when I have to give up something (or someone) really important to me. Or if I had a bad day at home, or at work, or even at church. Or if I had a ton of homework due, or if my teacher was being an idiot, or if I didn't get a good grade on an assignment. Or if I spent the last however many nights listening to people rant about their parents, or the guy they like, or school, or whatever.

I'm sorry that I'm not perfect. I'm sorry that I care too much.
I'm only human.
But I really do think I'm going to work on this.
Yes, I'll still care, but I'm going to try to stop giving things up... At least things (and people) who are important to me.
We'll see how it works out, I guess.

Kelsey

Good times with my sister. =]

So, today was a very hot day. Very. 107 degrees kind of hot. My sister and I had been talking to our mom about how we need a pool in our backyard, just like any other hot day. A little while later, my sister randomly told me her idea.
So you know what we did?
We went to Big Lots! and bought a $20 kiddie pool!

It didn't take that long to inflate, thanks to our handy-dandy air mattress pumps.

But filling it with water? It took FOREVER.
And by the time we got it filled with the freezing cold water, it was really cloudy and not as warm.
But we got in anyway. =]

It was great. That thing is pretty big for a kiddie pool, actually. We could probably fit five our six people in it! Crazy.

Party in our kiddie pool! =D

Kelsey

School. =[

So last quarter at CBC was going well enough. It took a week or so to get used to having three very different online classes, but I finally got the hang of it. Like most online classes, none of my teachers posted our grades during the quarter. They did it all at the very last minute, so none of us knew how we were doing in the class.

That's where my problem began, I guess.

I have been given a very unfair grade in my government class. I checked my grades (they were finally posted on the site three days after they were supposed to be!), and I had a 0.7 in that class. How did that happen? I turned in everything! There was a problem with the first exam (it wouldn't let me save any of my answers), but I had sent an email to my teacher explaining the problem and with the answers at the bottom. He wrote me back and said that he understood the technical difficulties and would grade my exam based on the answers I sent him.

Then, I had more technical difficulties with my city council post. I posted it on the 8th (it was due on the 12th) at about 4:00 in the afternoon. I refreshed the posts to make sure it was there, and it was. But on the last day of the class, I was going through all my posted assignments to make sure everything was there, but my city council post was gone. I sent my professor an email with the attached file and once again told him about stupid tech difficulties in WebCT, but he never wrote back.

Now, after I emailed him to ask why my grade was so low, he said I didn't turn in a whole bunch of assignments. Trust me, I did turn them in. I have all the files saved on my computer just in case something like this happened. I wrote him back and told him I'd send him the files to prove it (I had to ask what format to send them in). He wrote back and said that he had changed my grade to a 1.0, but since I "didn't post the assignments, he wouldn't change my grade to be any higher." If I didn't turn in an assignment, WHY WOULD I HAVE THE ASSIGNMENTS??? It's all very frustrating. And there's no other way to change my grade.

So now I'm going to have to take the class again. It's going to mess up my whole schedule. Great.

I HATE CBC sometimes. Like now.

Oh, and it's the second day of summer quarter, and I've already taken two tests in my English class. Yay.

Kelsey

Remembering the good ol' days...

So, I got bored today and I decided to go through alllll my pictures from my old computer and the ones I have saved on this one. Of course, I came across many, MANY pictures that brought back good (and bad) memories. I figured that I might as well share them with you guys!

(I apologize now for how many pictures I may be posting, and I apologize for any spontaneous outbursts of laughter ^_^ )

My old youth group on our beach trip. This was our "moody artists on a cliff" picture. =]

Oh gosh. The youth rafting trip. Patty and Sam were conspiring to throw me in the river! Ha. They never did get me!
What REALLY happens on marching band trips! We take illegal pictures at the Auburn Supermall =]
Aww, me and Caitline! We were taking pictures at 2 am in my basement. Ahahaha. Good times, good times... Oh my gosh. This was me a loooooooooong time ago at camp! Go Silver Lake Camp! Yes... This one made it onto the camp CD! King's Theatre! Ahh, yes. This was my first year in the group. Can you find me? (Hint: I'm in the second row!)

Champion! Demon parts are always fun. Seriously. (Oh, look how young I am! That was five or six years ago! Crazy!)

King's Theatre my second year. Doncha love drama kids? =]

Oh look! I'm up front, being the Glamour Girl. And look! It so wasn't 2002. The timestamp LIES.

Ahh! Me and my twin Kelli marching in the fair parade this year! Psh, look at that perfect roll-step!

My family (minus my dad, who, of course, is taking the picture) in Lincoln City a few years ago. =]

FLUTIES! This is what we do at band camp when we're in sectionals... Hahahahaha. I love the wrestling gym =]

Okay, I have to go to practice. I might post later. Who knows?

See ya'll.

Kelsey

Finally!

Ahh. After twelve long weeks of class, I'm done with physical geography!
I know, I know, it was an online class so it shouldn't have been that bad... but it was! My professor made up words, but we still had to define them. And, as I have learned, there are way too many words that mean essentially the same thing. Oh gosh, like anything rock-related... waaaaay too many words!

But, I still have government and sociology to do. Thankfully, those should be a lot easier. Emphasis on the "should be" part. Oh, college...


Okay, change of subject: Dreams. I have weird dream phases that I go through. Between the ages of birth and about 14, I had disturbing dreams. I mean REALLY disturbing dreams. They're scarier than anything you'll ever see. Trust me. Not only that, but they were so real. I could smell, taste, and feel everything. It was not pleasant, and especially not for someone as young as I was.
Yes, I had a few okay dreams during that time. Well, I had maybe ten good dreams during that time. But still, it counts. However, during that time, there was also this dream that I kept having. It was weird, and I'm really not sure if it was a "good" dream or a "bad" dream. It was the same concept every time, but just a little different. I was in a train car that connected to two other cars (obviously). The car behind it was on fire, and it had a phone sitting on a desl. The fire didn't spread, it just sort of sat there. The car in front of it only opened once; it was locked all the other times. Like I said, the dream was a little different every time, but I had it many, many times during that time period.
Then I moved on to my super-insomniac period that lasted for a year. I would stay up for three or four nights in a row, then crash. Stay up, crash. It was not a good cycle.
Then came my dreamless phase that also lasted for a year. Okay, I know, we have many dreams every night, so I wasn't technically dreamless. But, for that whole year, I couldn't remember any of my dreams. You know the feeling where you know you had a dream, and you can kind of remember it, but not enough to comprehend it? I didn't even experience that phenomena. I just... couldn't remember.
Now, thankfully, I'm into a new stage. I remember my dreams, and they've all been pretty pleasant. But my dreams are still weird. It really does seem like I'm awake in many of them. I can tell when I'm dreaming in most of them (like last night's dream. I knew I didn't have to rush from the mall to church, I knew that I didn't have to worry about driving the opposite way of where I needed to be going... I knew all of that). But then I have other dreams... Dreams where everything just... feels so real. I can feel genuine emotions, I can touch things and actually feel them, I can smell things, I can taste things...
Oh, and the whole theory about if you die in a dream, you'll actually die? So not true. I've died plenty of times in my dreams, and I'm still alive. I was shot once, and I could feel just how painful it was to have that bullet go through my chest, to feel myself slowly bleeding to death. I don't suggest it, by the way. Note to everyone: Try to avoid being shot.

Anyway, I'm really not sure why I went off on a dream ramble, but I did. And actually, this isn't what I wanted to ramble about pertaining to dreams. I decided to stop myself before I said something I would regret, thus putting at least two of my friendships in danger. Yay self-control! =]

Goodnight everyone!

Kelsey

Realizations.

I've done a lot of thinking the past few weeks. I'm hitting that stage in life- the stage where I realize that your childhood really does fly by. Is it sad that I'm only 17 years old and I'm really feeling the effects of this? Well, okay, that's probably normal. But still!

I was watching Bug Juice this week, and that pretty much led to an emotional breakdown. I loved that show when I was little. I STILL love that show! But I realized it was filmed eleven years ago. ELEVEN YEARS! Watching these kids (who are waaay older than me, actually) made me think of my own times at camp. I miss those days... A week away from parents, at a camp with hundreds of kids, a lake, bad food, games, chapel, too much sugar, and huge bugs (cockroaches, anyone?)... the makings of a good summer camp. Of course, this made me realize something huge: this is the last summer that I'm able to go to camp. That doesn't seem like that big of a deal, but it was to me. It really symbolizes the end of my childhood. Oh, nostalgia...

Then I started watching old Nickelodeon shows. You know, the good shows: Salute Your Shorts, Hey Dude!, Legends of the Hidden Temple, David the Gnome, Gulla Gulla Island, Kablam!, All That, Weinerville, Rugrats, Doug, and all those other amazing shows. Oh man, the memories...

Today was graduation. I didn't go, sadly. I was exhausted from taking my sister to the airport this morning (after less than an hour of sleep), and I felt really sick. So I stayed home. And, of course, I realized that it's going to be ME graduating next year. Not only will I be graduating from high school, I'm going to be graduating from COLLEGE. Next June, I'll have my AA. Now THAT is a weird feeling.

I'm working harder than ever at trying to get scholarships. I've looked at waaaay too many Christian colleges these past few months. In a little over a year, I'm going to (hopefully) be away at one of these colleges. I'll be on my own. I'll be trying to make it through a Worship Arts program. I'll be embarking on a very, VERY unstable career path. Soon after, I'll be thinking about marriage. Then a family. Then... well, you get the picture. When did I grow up? Seriously. It seems like just yesterday I was crying to Ms. Joleen in preschool because Danielle didn't want to be my friend anymore (even though she's my cousin, so it didn't really matter...).

Wow. I really do feel old. I'm in college. I have one year left until I leave home. Well, if I get scholarships, that is. I can't afford tuition at any of my college choices... and I'll still gladly accept donations, of course =]

Kelsey

Cleaning house.

Cleaning is, oddly enough, a very relaxing thing to do. Or, at least it was today.
My room was, like every other normal teenager's room, a complete mess. I hadn't really had any spare time to clean it because my oh-so-wonderful professors decided that we just needed more work to do. But, since today was Memorial Day and I had nothing going on (and I was trying to avoid my dad, like I do every time he's home), I decided to clean it.

But it was so much more than just cleaning up my room. I've had quite a few nasty habits sneak back into my life, and they were starting to take over (much like the piles of old assignments in my room). I knew they were there, but I kept making excuses for them. They aren't REALLY hurting anyone. Nobody has to know. I'm just too busy to take care of that right now. But you know what? They WERE starting to affect the people around me. People DID start figuring things out. And I'm SURE I had enough time to deal with those little buggers.

So, today I cleaned house.
I now actually have room to actually work out in my room.
My laptop is actually at my desk instead of sitting on a TV tray by my couch.
And I'm almost starting over.
Almost.
I can't erase things that have happened. I wouldn't want to even if I could. They've contributed to who I am.
So I'm not starting over, but I'm now as close to starting over as is possible.

Cleaning is a real eye-opening experience. You might want to take the time to finally organize your closet, or clean off the kitchen table, or... well, you get the hint.

Kelsey

Oh, and you are now a witness to my lovely insomnia. I'm posting a blog at four in the morning, and now I'm going to work out (since I now have room to work out in my bedroom). Hope you all are sleeping better than I am!

College. *Sigh*

I'm really not sure what I'm going to say in this blog. I could talk about the negative impacts of globalization on the general public. I could talk about music. I could even spend the whole blog talking about myself and ranting about my day. Who knows? I sure don't!

But here's the warning for this blog:
I spent seven hours today doing a sociology exam. I ended up having to make up a lot of it because my professor gave us impossible things to do for the questions, like research the production process of an article of clothing we own. The information is not easy to find, if it's even available. So I made it up. I'm hoping God will understand this necessary fabrication of the truth.
Then, after that wonderful seven hours (yeah, right), I spent another four hours and forty minutes doing not one, but TWO assignments for my physical geography class. I'm slightly dead after doing this work, so ignore any nonsensical things I say.


Why is college so darn expensive? I don't understand. Going to CBC through Running Start costs me about $130 in lab fees and usually somewhere between $250 and $500 for books. This summer, I'm taking two classes: English and speech. My English class is online, and my speech class is a fast-track class. Tuition is going to be well over $600, and books are going to be probably around $300. I have to pay for Fall quarter at the same time, so tack on a few hundred dollars. I'm really not sure how I'm going to pay for all of this... Especially since I don't have a job, I pay for everything (car, gas, school, whatever...), and I support Jessica. But, whatever, I'll figure it out.

The thing I AM worried about, however, is how I'm going to pay to go to a 4-year college. I really want to go to VISIBLE. That is the absolute perfect school for me. But it's $17,000 a year, and it's in Tennessee. But, you don't have to buy any books, and they actually help you get into a career in the music industry. My parents already told me that I probably won't be able to go to college (other than through Running Start, of course). But at the same time, they told me I HAD to go to college, even though my intended career path doesn't require me to have a degree.
How does that work?
I have to go to college, but I won't be able to go to college.
...
Okay.
And yet my sister is basically going to college three times.
She just graduated from CBC with her AA. She was going to be an ESL teacher, so she graduated with her AA in Education. But she decided to switch her major to Business, so she has to go back for another two years so she can transfer her credits to either WSUTC or Heritage (I can't keep track of where she's going!), where she'll go for two to four years.

And then there's me.
The music major.
The one who always gets the short end of the stick.
The different one in the family.
Can I go to college?
Noooo. Not unless I push myself to the limits to get enough scholarships. But, if I push myself any harder, I will have another stress-related injury. It's bad enough doing seven-hour long exams and huge assignments. But trying to write a thoughtful essay for a scholarship on top of all that?
I do think I'd explode. Hmm. But if I explode, I won't have to worry about college...
Now there's an idea!

Anyway, I am accepting donations to the Kelsey Needs College Money fund. Just ask to learn the full details of how you can donate. I do accept cash and personal checks. I would accept all major credit and debit cards, but I don't have one of those cool swipey-machines. Sorry.

And sorry that this turned into a ranting college student blog. I'll try harder next time. =]

Kelsey

(I'm in a very Harry Potter mood. Don't ask.)

Thoughts.

Earlier today, I went yardsaling with my mom and sister, just like I do every weekend. For anyone who takes part in the greatness of yardsales, I'm sure you're very aware of the typical yardsale:

Tables filled with stuff, people crowded around them, bad parking jobs, screaming kids, people trying to steal something that would have only cost 25 cents anyway...

I'm not sure why, but I realized today just how greedy we are. Sure, I know that people are greedy. But it really hit me today.

I read the most recent letter from the little girl I sponsor in Ghana [her name is Jessica Offeiwaa (Ekua), and she's 10 years old. Please pray for her and her family!] She was so excited to tell me about her Christmas! The first paragraph was spent with her telling me how glorious God was and how much she loved him. Then she moved on to tell me about what she got for Christmas. I could visualize her bouncing up and down while her social worker wrote the letter. You want to know what made her so happy?

She got a dress for Christmas.
She had outgrown her nice dress, and she was very upset going to church because she wanted to be respectful and dress nicely for God.
This new dress meant so much to her.
She sent me a picture of her mom and dad standing with her, wearing her brand new dress, of course.

She can't write, or at least not in English, so her social worker writes for her. So, on the back of every letter, she draws me a picture. I've gotten a pineapple and a house so far. =]
But you want to know what she drew on the back of this letter?
She drew a Christmas tree with a present under it, her in her dress kneeling down in prayer, and a cross with a heart beside it.
This little girl loves this dress, not because of how she looks, but because it's respectful to wear in God's house. Her parents are thrilled that Jessica could receive this dress, thanks to the help of everyone who sponsors a child through Compassion because they couldn't afford to get her anything like it.

Why is it that one little girl can be on top of the world for getting a single dress for Christmas, and yet we can complain about how much we want that new TV, or how we just NEED new shoes. Do we need those things? Are they in some way sustaining our ability to live? Will they truly make us completely happy?

Just a few things to think about. Oh, and I really encourage you to check out Compassion's website. There are many children from all over the world who need your help. It's $32 a month, and it'll give them whatever food, water, clothing, education, and health care they need. Trust me, if I can do it as a poor high school/college student without a job, you can do it. If God places it on your heart to sponsor one of these children, I encourage you to do it. Trust me, I ignored Him at first, and look how that turned out ^_^

Kelsey

Formalities.

Well, I've decided to start anew.
I've abandoned my former blog because... I don't know, I guess it's just something that should be in the past. Sure, I could have just deleted all my posts and continued on with life, but I think I should keep it around to remind me of how far I've come.

Anyway, here's my NEW blog. I really don't know what sort of subjects will be written into it. I guess we'll find out, now won't we?

However, I am going to try to take the focus off of myself in this blog. I may have to slip from time to time and have a rant about something totally ridiculous that happened, but I promise to not enjoy it ^_^

Now for a little "me" time:
-My name is Kelsey.
-I'm 17 years old.
-I'm a junior in high school and a freshman in college. (And only a few weeks away from being a senior and a sophmore. Now that's a scary thought...)
-I love music. I'm going into music ministry with a focus on vocals. =]
-I'm really hoping to go on a missions trip to Ghana, and soon!
-I play the flute and guitar, I'm re-teaching myself the piano, and I sing, if you couldn't tell by my career goals.
-I'm trying to be completely open and honest. It's definitely trying, but I've gotten a lot better.
-I can speak some Spanish, some ASL, a little bit of Russian, German, Pharsee, and I'm learning French. I know, overachiever =]
-I'm obsessed with bowflexing!
-...And zumba (zumba is a type of aerobic dancing that incorporates many latin style of dances, including salsa, merengue, kumbia, hip hop, bellydancing, and reggae.)

Okay, enough about myself. I've got physical geography and sociology work to be doing!

Kelsey